LinkedIn is THE Facebook for careerists. Or for the wannabes. A way to show how great you are and how motivated you are concerning the achievement of career goals. Every day LinkedIn motivates me to highlight my profile and to make me a “superstar”. Profiles with a profile picture receive 12 times more views. At least that is what I heard. So the possibility to be contacted by a personal recruitment company is much higher. These offer me super awesome jobs such as personal consultant, sales representative or market researcher (means you call people who are annoyed by you and if they are not annoyed, you ask them annoying questions.)
My profile is unreal and is haunting me. Moreover, it is constantly pressuring me. It is regularly wanting me to unlock my non-available potential. I’ve already caught myself simmering with excitement the end of the month, just so I have another month listed on my work experience. Wait a minute. Didn’t Jay Shetty say that you should not live for your CV? No matter. On LinkedIn I come across like a super motivated, highly-educated and ambitious professional and not bipolar, escapist or defiant.
I like too many influencers whose motivational articles do not motivate me at all. I don’t read companions anymore. You read the same thing everywhere anyway: How do I manage my time wisely? -> And not in front of the TV. How do I improve my negotiating skills? -> So I can rip even more people off. How do I become happier -> Follow your passions.
I don’t like advisors. Sometimes I don’t like myself because I catch myself at acting like an advisor.
I cannot compete with a world population of 8 billion people for attention. Here, my ambition leaves me in the lurch. Somewhere you are just a small cog in a functioning system whose failure makes no difference. The spare wheel is already in the starting blocks. Sometimes you have to fall off the high horse yourself.
Luckily, my LinkedIn profile only shows my strengths and not my weaknesses. One night I woke up, drenched in sweat, scared and crying, believing you now also have to submit this information. Then I would not be an ideal job candidate anymore. I would have to live without the below-average job offers. And I could certainly no longer apply to utopian job offers. At the end of my nerves and in the middle of the night, I looked at the current jobs offers, wondering what my USP could be. I could not tell. Self-portrayal is so hard. **** careerist.
Maybe my LinkedIn profile will not look weird to me anymore. Maybe I do not want to see, how I compete against 273 other applicants. Maybe I will use the time useful instead of grooming my superstar profile, or maybe I still like to spend the whole day watching TV. Maybe I do not want to talk about common interests, but rather about varied ones. Maybe I do not want to set high career goals. However I cannot let dumb people run the world.
Maybe I’ll do something very crazy and click on “Easy apply”, just to not write back to the nice and kind recruiter. A job change after less than a year of work experience is also not very recommendable.
Maybe I’ll network with my strange “Over-Achiever” person. Try to copy parts together and unify them into a whole – As I always do with PowerPoint or Word. The clear line between work and private life would be gone. In vain the whole effort to draw a stringent separation. In vain the constant efforts to serve Facebook and LinkedIn in different windows. Maybe in this case, I rather prefer being haunted by two personalities.